And a good evening to you all from across the globe after another GREAT DAY in the Lion City. It should be noted that, as I type this, my lovely wife is KNOCKING BACK BOOZE in the office, as they are hosting "finance drinks" IN THE CUBE FARM. I find this fascinating, especially since about .000001% of Asians drink alcohol. But then again, there are several Kiwis, Aussies, Brits, and Americans in that crowd. Ahhhh, now it all makes sense...
So I realize I've been radio silent (to quote the Hairless Wonder) for the past week, but I have a good excuse - WILD CARD AND HITMAN WERE IN TOWN! Seriously, this week has felt like any ole' integration week, complete with early mornings, late nights, and a LOT of beer. That being said, a) it was a blast, and b) all my old Transition peeps would be REALLY proud of the amount of expenses I was able to deflect. :-)
The guys showed up in the office on Tuesday looking none the worse for wear after 2 full days in transit and a 1 AM arrival in Sing Sing. Deets is now sporting the new "I'm a spiritual man now with a Marine buzz cut" look, which of course did nothing but make him appear EVEN HOTTER to the women of Southeast Asia. Seriously - we should have held a bloody autograph session for the guy.
Dinner that night was Brotzeit, which is a German place that features Paulaner on draft (it's actually brewed at a satellite facility in Singapore). In 4 words: SOOOOOOOOOO GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUD....peppy cheekies.
It should also be noted that Martin's leadership team arrived on this day (my peers), and they were a hoot. In the team meeting I did find it hilarious that I was the token American in a room with a South African, 2 Singaporeans, 4 Indians, 1 Japanese, 1 Filipino, and 1 Indonesian. You gotta admit - that's a pretty cool feeling when that's your staff meeting.
On Wednesday we worked like sweaty Columbian coffee donkeys, discussing every Shared Services topic under the sun until calling it quits at 8 PM to roll over to the Singapore Flyer and a restaurant called "Seafood Paradise." I gotta admit, it was guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuud, and I even rocked some chili crab and black pepper crab for the first time (chili crab is the national dish). All of it was WICKED tasty, but the highlight of the night was the 15 minute verbal war between me and Wildcard. You see, at some point, Deets launched into another one of his "Barry's destroying everything that is America and will single-handedly eliminate our company, cause World War III, and destroy our way of life, leaving us all in the poor house" speeches, and I simply had to respond. During this whole conversation, NO ONE at the table said a word except us, and when I said, "Well, you're an idiot," you could have heard a pin drop. It was classic, as I'm pretty sure the Indian folks at the table had never heard someone say that to their BOSS'S BOSS. But since Wild Card and I are boys and go way back, we continued on without missing a beat. We also managed a nightcap at some fake Irish Bar before we were kicked out at 11 PM (I mean hey, it's late by bar standards in Sing Sing).
On Thursday I got to live a dream - I SPOKE AT A TELEPRESENCE! That's right, baby - Sammy the Bull on screen, broadcast live across 10 locations, just blabbing about ANYTHING. It was awesome - I was drunk with power. We were supposed to give fun facts about ourselves, and I said that I'd been to all 50 states (which I thought was cool, right?). Oh no, I was EASILY beaten.
This guy Mani gets up there, and he says, "Hi, my name's Mani - payroll in India. My fun fact is that I was kidnapped at knife point once...but then the kidnappers realized they had the wrong person so they kicked me out of the car and gave me money for a taxi home." ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?!?!?!?! That guy went SECOND out of 8 - how are any of the rest of us gonna top that?
Looking back, there were some excellent quotes from the leadership team from the week:
1. "In Japan, we don't put wasabi on our Kit Kats."
2. "You should always go for the spicy balls. I love them."
3. "I do love wearing women's underwear and I'm resigning."
4. I think this will be really hard, but if you're ready I think I can take more."
Like I said - a GREAT crew.
On Thursday night Muffin and I went out with Wild Card and Hitman for a final dinner at Red Dot. Steve - they had green beer!!!! I'm tellin' ya, man - it WILL be there next time we go - book it.
Fellas - it was a great week, and it was really, really good to see you both. Safe travels to the UK - DRINK A TIMMY TAYLOR FOR ME!!!!
Okay, that's all the news that's fit to print. Chat tomorrow!
Sam and Jenny